It's late and I want to sleep but I wanted to write something about the idea that we're each affected by the overall mood of the country -- the confidence level of a nation seeps down into the consciousness of its citizens.
As much as I have no draw to Edinburgh or Scotland, I keenly follow their fortunes. I feel that a part of me is invested in their future, because perhaps that echoes my own future. We can leave behind our childhood streets and forget the areas where we grew up, but nothing changes the fact that that's where we came from. It'll follow us forever.
We can move away, better our lives and achieve things we never thought we could. We can over-ride the perspectives of earlier times and previous places but it seems to take effort to overcome the disappointment of slow progress at "home". Perhaps this is especially true when you don't have someone beside you every step of the way looking out for your best interests; when you look elsewhere for encouragement.
Advice from friends is helpful but we all want to believe in something. Not silly stories or supernatural entities but something to inspire development in cities, societies, personalities. Something to feel a part of, proud of. Something to contribute to. Yet I'd rather disconnect. I'd rather not see myself as from real-world Edinburgh.
I see myself from an Edinburgh that exists only in my head. The Edinburgh where pioneers were born and visionaries created. But the Enlightenment is well and truly behind us and for all the progress that is being made, I tend to see a million things that could be done better. Some will be hindered by practical problems, some will be hindered by a lack of investment, some may not have been thought of, but the majority I imagine have merely never have been attempted.
We all need to work harder work harder work harder work harder.
Graham's blog: politics, poetry, and introspection